he wasn't there (tasha)

[damien alexander malfoy]

Damien didn't know what to do at all anymore. It had all be so great since him and Tasha had finally admitted their feelings to each other and decided to give it a go as a couple. He had been really happy, one because he was with the girl of his dreams, she was smart, beautiful, funny and not to mention feisty. They had been perfect together, a really good team. Until his mum and dad broke up. Obviously in his era, his mother had died when he was twelve. But in this era, she was still alive and he hoped some how that she wouldn't die and leave him. But now scorpius and dani were no longer together, he doubted that he would be conceived, meaning some day he would cease to exist. Sure he would have been at ease if it was any other guy the lucas weasley, he was from damien's era which meant that it was not supposed to happen that way. Then to add to that, he had gone and gotten tasha pregnant. Of course Tasha wanted to keep the baby and for them to raise it together. But Damien wasn't sure. Ever since his mother had died he had always tried to do his best with isobel, his little sister who was two years younger than him. But recently he had been angry all the time, uptight and scared. The slightest annoyance caused pure agitation and made him lash out on anyone. Recently the youngest potter, lily luna, had been on the receiving side of his anger. He had broken her wrists and punched her face in. but she had somehow forgiven him and for that he was grateful.

He held it together in public, for the sake of his reputation, he avoided tasha at all costs along with his parents and sister. It was hard on him, he had been through pain when his mother had died, he had had to care for his little sister and show her that the world wasn't always bad, but he was beginning to doubt his words from all those years ago. Bad things seemed to happen when he was around, damien couldn't help but feel responsible. Damien dug into his pockets for a lighter and cigarette. he placed the cigarette in between his dry chapped lips, and lit the cigarette. taking a drag, he placed the zippo back into the pocket of his robes. Damien didn't know what was wrong with him, he had seen his uncle and aunt deal with teen pregnancy, sure it had been a rocky road at first but then things ran more smoothly. But this hadn't happened to damien, tasha hadn't planned on telling him, it had slipped out in the attempt to stop him from fighting. It had scared him, more than anything had ever done and the worst part was that if he was like this now, what would he be like in the future? His era had been the only era to go back in time, he was thankful that his child's era did not. Damien dreaded to think of what would happen if he had met his child. What would they tell him? He was a a bad father, her was never around. Or maybe they wouldn't even reconise him... because he had left tasha to bring up the baby by herself.

Damien slowly slid down to the floor and brought his knees up to his chest whilst taking another drag from his cigarette. He could remember the night when him and tasha had finally confessed their love for each other. It had been the best night of his life, he had been so happy. They had been so happy...

[natasha zarah lupin]

Natasha was stressed both mentally and physically she wasn't entirely sure how much more she'd be able to take. It had all been so great, so wonderful she couldn't believe her luck, if luck was the best word when Damien confessed he felt the same way as she did. It was perfect. The perfect picture of what seemed to be like the perfect couple. They decided to give it a try because their love was so strong, they had been waiting so long for this chance. The chance to shine together rather than seperately as friends even if it was close friends at that. Tasha was almost stricken to the bone when she found out she was pregnant with Damien's child after the one time they had slept together as a 'couple' not just a no commitment thing. She was both aprehensive as well as slightly happy. It actually explained the sudden sickness and the throwing up at random hours. At first she didn't want to believe it was true but when a little bump started showing and her skin stretching, she knew this was all happening whether she liked it or not. A part of Tasha knew she had to tell Damien but the moment never arose until he was fighting and even then she had only blurted it out, out of shock horror. It stopped the fight, not that it entirely had any other good effect other than that, since he thought she was kidding. She can distinctively remember his words 'you're kidding right?'. For that small moment she played along but there was clear sarcasm that he just didn't get, infuriating her more.

Walking through the dungeons or should the term waddle be more appropirate , Tasha didn't know what to do with her life anymore. Placing a hand on her bump, which had grown considerable since the last time she had felt it properly she let out a small sigh. Little nemo had done nothing wrong yet he or she was causing all this trouble, if that was the right word to use. Tasha couldn't bare the thought of giving up her child even if that was what Damien wanted. It is as much as part of her as it is him, so that only leaves him with half the rights to what should happen to it. Well thats considering if he even has a say since of recent all he seems to be doing if avoiding her and blocking everything out of his life. All Tasha really needed from him was reassurance and that just wasn't coming. However she had one regret from recently and that was insulting him the one time he was actually around although still hiding. She said ' any dick can make a baby but it takes a man to be a dad' it was harsh of her and this she regretted deeply.

Tasha began to turn a corner down in the dungeons when she felt a sudden kick which caused her to yelp somewhat whislt bending forward, hand still on her bump. "Ow, oh my ... ouch." Her voice seemed to bounce of the walls but right now all she cared about was what was going on inside of her. If there was a good a time as any for Damien to show up it would be now.

[damien alexander malfoy]

"Ow, oh my ... ouch." damien's eyes flung open as he immediately recognised the voice, natasha zarah lupin. His girl, her voice was beautiful but I barley registered as it normally did. She was in pain, damien pushed himself up and took one last drag on his cigarette before throwing it on the floor and stamping on it vigorously. He didn't care about the consequence of it was sound, he only cared for his tasha. ''Tasha?

[/color] damien called in desperation, he hoped she was okay he needed her to be okay. Damien cursed the badly lit corridors and quickened his pace into a run. Her back was to him and she was half keeling over. Then he was kneeling at tashas side, gently rubbing her back. "what's wrong?'' he asked, out of breath. He was frantic, panic surging through him as he glanced around. Scooping her into his arms, he held her, tears streaming down his face. The thought of tasha being in pain upset him a lot, so much so that he was crying.Damien rocked her gently, despite how he had been avoiding her he had always been watching from afar. Making sure she was safe and well. The truth was he didn't know what to do, he didn't want to disappoint but he didn't have any confidence with this sort of thing. Recently his self esteem had hit rock bottom, tasha was normally the only person who could help him in his times of need but he had refused to let her, or anyone for that matter.
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[natasha zarah lupin]

As the pain penetrated through her stomach, Tasha couldn't help but find herself bending even further over to breathe. It felt as if something was crushing each and every one her ribs without any thought to how it felt for her. Truth be known Tasha had for that small moment forget that there was another life inside of her and that the cause of her pain could infact be little nemo who was probably not so little now. Of course babies kick and move around, and now she actually thought about it, this pain was vaguely familiar but now it was amplified much more than earlier twinges. "Tasha?" echoed through the empty hall as Tasha attempted to look around for the source of the sound that was definitely Damien's voice. "Here..." She tried to call out but was hit by a sudden surge of pain instead leaving the call more of a whisper. Her breathing became shallow and her vision blurred faster than she would've ever expected. It wasn't however long before she felt slight relief by a hand gently rubbing her arched back, it helped for a while to calm her down. "Its the ... baby... the baby damien." She exclaimed in a stutter through each break in the pain. She couldn't stand for much longer, as her legs began to shiver so you could say Damien had perfect timing in lifting her.

Tasha could sort of see his outline but for the most part he was a big blur, it wasn't until something wet touched her body that she knew he was crying or at least that was what she thought the wetness was. Blinking a little she patted the top of her leg just to make sure little nemo wasn't planning on making an early appearance. "are you crying?" She asked once her breathing had regained a more natural rhythm.

Tasha was afraid of losing them both. Damien and the baby.

[damien alexander malfoy]

Damien couldn't stand to see natasha zarah lupin in this way, he had always cared for her even when they had only been friends. He remembered the time some group of guys had been taking the piss out of her for her canine heritage. He had found her crying by herself sitting under the whomping willow. She had looked so young and angelical the tender age of fourteen, so different from the tasha he knew and loved now. She looked scared and in excruciating pain. "Its the ... baby... the baby damien." She exclaimed in a stutter through each break in the pain. Damien held her in his arms, he didn't have a clue what to do, he knew she wasn't due for a good few months. He didn't really know much about the pregnancy cycle so it terrified him, he couldn't loose his tasha and deep down he couldn't lose the baby. ''Tash, breathe please. What do I do?''

damien gritted his teeth together and took his own advice, drawing in a much needed breath."are you crying?" damien just nodded, continuing to hold her close to him and rub her back. He then realized she probably couldn't see his nod, since she was lying across him. Tasha was the only one that ever saw him cry and of course his little sister isobel. He hated crying it showed weakness, pain and despair. Something he hated to feel and do, something that scared him right down to the core, the something which always meant something was wrong. When something bad happened, Damien was always the first to run away and hide. He couldn't deal with such emotions so he tended to just try to avoid them until the commotion was over. Take his issy for instance, he had been to over protective and when she had needed protecting he couldn't do it. Then with Tasha, he seemed to totally forget about protection and look where that had got him.

Damien couldn't even bring himself to look at tasha, what he had put her through he hated himself for it. Now it looked like he was being punished by seeing tasha in pain like this.

[natasha zarah lupin]

a part of natasha zarah lupin wanted this all to be over now. right this second, she couldn't cope anymore not in the state things currently were. she may be known as the lone wolf, but the lone mother doesn't really work for her. this isn't just her child here that is causing the excurisating pain, its damien alexander malfoy's aswell. sure she knows he can't carry it for her or even take away the pain but he could've been there a little bit more. tasha knew he was scared bloody hell she was scared shitless herself but she had no choice but to get on with the situation she had found herself in. there were no other turns to make in her life considering she would never, never in a million years give up her child for anything. even if the birth killed her she'd go through it just like her mother did giving birth to her and her twin. one life for another is worth it right? because you maybe losing but you're also gaining as well. it was obvious that tasha had spent countless days weighing up her options and what could happen. this pain was only the beginning of many things that could be out of the ordinary for this pregnancy.

"awtch..." tasha let out another screech, her body really wasn't made for baby movement. listening to damien's voice soothed her enough to find a suitable breathing pattern, in and out , in and out between counts of ten in her head. "i don't know..." patting the top of her thigh again, this time tasha felt moistured and immediately brought her hand up to her face so she could see it. tasha blinked several times to reduce her blurred vision once again but she was definitely seeing red. and red wasn't a good omen to be seeing, not now. letting her werewolfs senses take over for a short moment, tasha grimaced this time not out of pain but pure and utter horror. the scent of blood was so strong she almost fainted there and then in damien's arms. "b-blood damien ...do some.." she exclaimed partly. then the darkness came.

tasha fainted.